Here's the deal, the way I see it.
You've probably already said one of these unfortunate phrases to your friend with cancer and that's ok. You didn't know any better. I didn't know any better either until Art got cancer.
So forgive yourself.
Guilt is the crusher of wisdom.
And now, after reading this or watching this video, you know what NOT to say ever again. That is a good tool to have in your "tool kit of wisdom."
The thing about saying the wrong thing is that it sounds Ok. The phrases come from a good place most of the time, but when you really get behind the words and even look carefully at your motive for saying them, you can see why they are not helpful.
Having a good life means looking at our mistakes, asking ourselves and others for forgiveness, and then at the next opportunity, digging a little deeper so we can come up higher.